Dear Crucial Skills, I have a new supervisor (recently promoted) and we have a difficult history. Previously she trained me, but her training was inadequate, she overloaded me with work, she demanded I complete assignments faster and faster, and she said I was making excuses if I couldn’t. Tomorrow, we have our first one-on-one and …
Crucial Conversations for Mastering Dialogue Posts
How can I maintain a healthy relationship with my partner when political discussions consistently escalate into verbal abuse? While we have an otherwise loving relationship, his angry reactions to my political views are damaging our communication. His views lean one way, and I lean the other, and if we discuss politics it turns into him cutting me off, digging into his views, and calling me stupid and other names. What can I do?
I have a coworker who has consistently misspelled my name for six months. It’s displayed correctly on my desk and my email signature, and yet this persists. How can I approach him about this without provoking defensiveness?
I have a coworker who dominates nearly every conversation. She is outspoken, brash, and often has no filter. Sometimes the things she says are uncomfortably candid. I don’t think she is a bad person, but I often find myself drained after speaking with her. How should I approach this?
I have a question about FACTS. There has been increasing public debate over facts and, it seems, increased disregard for science. I’ve seen this at work and home. For example, my mother-in-law suggested that my wife and I buy a certain crib when our baby was born. When we showed her the crib had been proven to harm babies and was banned, she said, “Well that study is wrong.”
At work people continually speak of “learning styles” even though the initial study that forwarded the idea has been disproven. Again, facts and research will indicate one thing, but people will still rely on their gut feeling.
So, how do you hold a conversation with someone who refuses to acknowledge evidence related to the disagreement? I’m not referring to differences of opinions, but to disregarding facts or evidence. I can see how Seeking Mutual Purpose might help, but the debate over evidence still takes a lot of energy. Where should I start?
I have a son who is a terrible listener. He monopolizes the conversation. If I question a statement he has made, he becomes quite defensive and sometimes angry. He is very rigid in his thinking and beliefs. How would you suggest I handle this situation?
Dear Crucial Skills, What advice can you give to a group after someone popular has been let go and there is dissent and frustration? I am not permitted to share the reasons for the decision to let this employee go, and it wasn’t my decision to make, but how do I help my team deal …
When an employee has a lot going on personally, it often shows up at work. These past few years have been tough on everyone, and I feel both empathy and a determination to hold clear boundaries. I want to extend grace to my employees, and I want them to meet their job duties and performance measures. How can I extend my sympathies and maintain clear professional boundaries? When I’ve asked before, people often cross professional boundaries and overshare inappropriate or personal information. Please help.
We’ve been learning Crucial Conversations skills at work. Things have been going well and we’ve had some great, open, and honest discussions about the skills and principles. However, several people have said that they only work if both parties use them. I said that I kindly disagree. It takes only one person in the conversation using the skills to have a successful Crucial Conversation. I’m having trouble expressing this better. How do I show that this is true?
My role involves working with all departments in the organization. I send important emails to executive teams and usually do not get replies. As an internal consultant, I need to get information from the C-suite. What should I do?