You write a lot about making others feel safe, including bosses. Why would it ever be a subordinate’s responsibility to make their boss feel “safe”? The power dynamic already places the superior in a position of safety. Bosses should already have training to effectively take feedback from those beneath them in the corporate hierarchy without needing their ego fluffed first.
I’ve made so many bad choices in the past that I’m in prison now. I love my daughter, and she is really hurt and angry with me. How do I build a relationship with her?
I hear lots of talk—and see lots of evidence—about how divisive the world is becoming. I hate to admit it, but I know I’m part of the problem. I feel an embarrassing amount of satisfaction when a comedian lands a great joke about a political party whose tenets I despise. And if I’m honest, I feel disgust toward people who hold certain positions opposite my own. I know I probably should feel more tolerant, but I don’t really want to. What would you say to me?
My brother is sixty-one and lost his wife ten months ago. He has now bottomed out. I have no idea how to help him. I listen, say what I can. I think he would benefit from grief counseling. He seems to be unable to move forward. He has no children. Is there anything I can do?
I don’t respect my boss as a leader. I know he has his own struggles, but I just don’t like him as a leader. I am fully aware of and even ashamed of my bad behavior. I like my job and my position, but I can’t stand him. What do you recommend? I am the worst version of myself when I interact with him.
Last year I developed a severe drinking problem that negatively affected both my kids, especially my nine-year-old son. He stayed with his dad while I was in rehab. I’m clean and sober now, but he still won’t stay with me, and I’m crushed by this. How can I rebuild trust with him?
Dear Crucial Skills, I have a new supervisor (recently promoted) and we have a difficult history. Previously she trained me, but her training was inadequate, she overloaded me with work, she demanded I complete assignments faster and faster, and she said I was making excuses if I couldn’t. Tomorrow, we have our first one-on-one and …
I have a coworker who dominates nearly every conversation. She is outspoken, brash, and often has no filter. Sometimes the things she says are uncomfortably candid. I don’t think she is a bad person, but I often find myself drained after speaking with her. How should I approach this?
I am a consultant and I frequently have clients who try to get more from me than originally agreed upon in a statement of work. This is always difficult to navigate, and I’m not sure how to do so without having problems so I usually just step up and do the work—but at a cost to me. How can I resolve these situations?
Dear Crucial Skills, What advice can you give to a group after someone popular has been let go and there is dissent and frustration? I am not permitted to share the reasons for the decision to let this employee go, and it wasn’t my decision to make, but how do I help my team deal …
