ABOUT THE AUTHOR Joseph Grenny is coauthor of four New York Times bestsellers, Change Anything, Crucial Conversations, Crucial Confrontations, and Influencer. READ MORE Dear Crucial Skills, I come from a close family. We’ve all had decent jobs and live comfortable lifestyles. However, since my brother lost his job a few years ago, he and his …

Dear Crucial Skills, Ten of us are struggling with how to deal with the bad behavior of our boss. Most of us are contemplating leaving this really good company because of it. Two others have quit already because of the bad and even abusive behavior and told the HR director and CEO. Nothing has changed. …

Dear Crucial Skills, We have a set of standards in our company. One of them references how we treat other employees with respect. Recently, I put one of my employees on verbal warning for calling another employee a vulgar name—a clear sign of disrespect. This was a pretty clear-cut case. But others are more gray. …

Dear Crucial Skills, A while back, my wife asked if it would be okay with me if her 30-year-old son set up residence in the spare bedroom for three months until he got his own home. I thought that sounded fine. It’s now been three years and the lad is still there. My wife doesn’t …

Dear Crucial Skills, I have been practicing my crucial conversations skills and found I actually used one the other night with my sister. She expressed her resentment to me about failing to consult her on a crucial family decision regarding our father’s health. Being a graduate of Crucial Conversations, I immediately recognized that I had …

Dear Kerry, In Master My Stories II, the Humanizing Question is “Why would a reasonable, rational and decent person do this?” Asking this question is often helpful in turning villains to humans and assuming the best in others. But what if the answer to the Humanizing Question is that this is not a reasonable, rational …

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Emily Moss is a Master Trainer and Senior Director of Client Training and Employee Development at VitalSmarts. READ MORE Dear Crucial Skills, I recently got a call from the head of another department. He asked me, “Why are the analysts afraid to ask you for a work product?” I tried to build …

Dear Crucial Skills, I am the eldest of six siblings. We grew up in a judgemental atmosphere and avoided confrontation, so “triangulation” occurs frequently. NO one, parents included, is willing to address the issues, but they are always willing to share it with the person whom they think will help fix it–that would be me. …

Dear Crucial Skills, I am a nursing supervisor in a nursing home. Most of our patients are white and most of our staff is non-white. Our staff is frequently subjected to vile, racist treatment and remarks by our patients. Naturally, this creates a very difficult working situation. Our staff provides quality care day after day …

Dear Crucial Skills, Could you please help me understand the practical use of the crucial accountability skill “CPR” for front-line supervisors on a manufacturing floor? It seems somewhat abstract to them when dealing with specific violations and our progressive discipline procedure. Signed, Real World Dear Real World, I’d love to help. CPR is a skill …