Crucial Skills

A Blog by Crucial Learning

Crucial Conversations for Mastering Dialogue

Before & After: How to Get What You Really Want by Jon K.

Recently, as my six-year-old daughter asked me for yet another Barbie, I said, “You don’t always get what you want, you need to earn it.”

She then said, “That’s not fair, you always get what you want. How do I get what I want?”

The Crucial Conversations book happened to be sitting on my desk, so I handed it to her, and laughing I said, “Read this, it gets you what you want.”

Now she refuses to put down the book. It goes in the car with us everywhere—to school, you name it. When someone asks why she is reading the book, she says, “Dad said from now on I’m going to get what I want.”

As many conversations are with my six-year-old, the full conversation was actually quite a crucial conversation about how to earn what you need and communicate that need. For the record, she “earned” the Barbie a few days later from her grandmother through some effective communication.

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3 thoughts on “Before & After: How to Get What You Really Want by Jon K.”

  1. Leonard Gilliard

    Now THAT’S funny! It looks like you two will have a lifetime filled with interesting crucial conversations. . .

  2. Ralph

    That is an awesome story! I will try it at home and see if my 6 year old, or any of the others bite! Great photo too!

  3. R.

    That is hilarious!!! I always read your tips; sometimes they apply, most of the time, just food for thought. I’m not poised enough to do all your stuff; haven’t tried, but like to read (and listen) to the articles and stories.

    Started to get your newsletter back in ’04 or so, when I had a foster home for adults and needed ideas on how to communicate. It didn’t do me any good, because I was dealing with (imagine that!) People!!! Anyway, great stuff, keep it coming, and maybe one of these days I’ll get good enough to try something and have it actually work.

    Rhonda Martin

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